Mission: Billy’s home life, 3 bears and a claw hammer

By Billy Harris

I wish it would stop raining, saying this as a kayaker is kind of weird I guess. The O-River was at a nice level and we were playing on Garb and having a great time and then the rain started about a week ago. IT hasn’t let up at all. I got all new boats from Jackson, headed down south to pick them up. Toddy’s Ice Cream and Tommy Gun a musician. His actual name is O’Reilly. He runs the black water challenge each year and all round a wicked guy. Takes care of the Jackson Crew when they are in town. Offered us a place to park the RV, and all the info you could need about the area. On top of that he has an icecream parlor… HELOOO ice cream. That’s Carly getting me a double scooper….

If you wanted to read about kayaking, there is not much below. If you wanted to see what a day in the life if B-Harris’s family your at the right spot.

Well after a feel weeks of paddling for the odd clinic and myself here and there I pulled into my parents place and shut the big white whale down for a break and some vehicle matinence. Ive been doing clinics and demo’s for the last gosh knows how long… TIRED. It’s nice to see the folks and hang out with one of my two little brothers. They are all completely nuts and a whole family a lot of fun to hang out with. My dad has one leg gets around pretty good and has the unusual ability to work on 5 projects at the same time and I don’t mean wave sport boats neither I think that he is still working on the pick nick table he was when I left a month ago. My mom, is a hooker…. Her and her gang hang out at the township hall and hook rugs or something and call them selves, “the happy hookers”. Dad’s afraid to go there, all they is drink spiked coffie and cackle away with each other Which leaves my dad and my brother to take care of the “Family embarrassment” A weiner dog. Pathetic little beast that as dad says is I quote“hard of hearing” I say it just doesn’t listen to him. Mal my little brother is a car wizard is left to catch the little monster in between looking after the whale my RV parked in the driveway. But having Mal chase the beast down is better than watching dad chase the thing with the hook end of his cane. Not only good entertainment when he catches it, but the use of his use of his extencive vocabulary is entertaining as well. Mean while inside the Siamese cat is hanging from the deer heads, tearing up the carpets, knocking over lamps and making impressive but stupid attempts at clearing large gaps in the beams on the ceiling of the main room with various degrees of success, which he does quite regularly. Nothing more exullirating than watching a scary movie and having a stupid cat, claws out, hit you from 12 feet up. The first time it happened I know that my voice cracked when I screamed, my parents howled with laughter. Still to this day make shreaking noises while mocking me… One night my buddy Dave was sitting on the couch (which pulls out) and leapt into the air holding his back. He looked at Carly and I and said. “Something just grabbed me” Stared at the couch for a second and went to get some water. He left the room and the disembodied cat arm extended out of the back of the couch between the pillows and started making clawing motions in the air looking for Dave again. The cat, some how got inside the couch and was launching attacks from between the pillows.

Mal as I sad is the only sane one of the group and I only mean kind of. He has a all wheel drive talon that is almost 400 Horse power and spends all day putting dump trucks together at work for GIN-COR and all night tinkering with what looks like a normal car. I figure he gets on average 4 hours of sleep a night. Mal is the care taker of what he likes to call the “OLD FOLKS HOME” Mal and I were standing inside the Zodiac which I am beefing up to accommodate a 50 Horse power motor and Mal grabs the 22 ounce hammer and leaps out of the boat and runs into the yard. My folks have a fishing lodge up north, just north of Algonquin provincial park and as in the woods as you can get without flying in. He runs at young 150 pound bear with claw hammer. Who does that? I am running for the shot gun he is running at the bear with a hammer. I run inside to grab the gun, moms running for the camera everyone is running in circles but dad. “whats going on” know one tells him anything, he was so ticked. I guess the last 2 days before they caught 2 pike both over 40 inches long and weighing 20+pounds a piece. Well they gutted them and left the guts in the fish cleaning hut and the bears came in… 3 of them. Nothing like living up the day with 3 live black bears… All the families came back from a morning of fishing to find my brother with a claw hammer and me with the shot gun standing on the front yard on guard playing hide and seek with 3 bears around the cabins they are renting. Mom we figure was around 400 pounds or so, and didn’t seem to worried about either Mal or I romping around in circles.

I should have a JK NORTH MISSION POSTED SOON

Billy Harris

MISSION: JK NORTH SESSION 2
Ontario:
Adventure Guide
382 King Street North
Waterloo, Ontario
Phone: (519) 886-3121
Email: barb@advguide.com

Ottawa Paddle Shack – A Jackson Kayak Preferred Dealer
422B Richmond Rd
Ottawa, Ontario
Phone: 613-725-5259
Fax: 613-725-5260
Email: Ottawa@paddleshack.ca
Web: www.paddleshack.ca

Boatwerks/Strano Outdoors – A Jackson Kayak Preferred Dealer
PO Box 327
Beachburg, Ontario
Phone: 705-286-1492

Vermont:
36 Park Road
Windsor, Vermont
Phone: 802-674-6767
Web: www.stillriveroutfitters.com

Umiak kayak shop
849 South Main Street
Stowe, Vermont
Phone: 802-253-2317
Email: paddle@umiak.com
Web: www.umiak.com/summer/s-index.html

Quebec:
Montreal
Camp de Base Boutique de plein air
173E Cartier
Pointe Claire, Quebec
Phone: 514-630-6717
Fax: 514-630-9946
Email: basecamp@qc.aira.com

New York
Sacandaga Outdoor Center – A Jackson Kayak SuperStore
One Whitewater Way
PO Box 1
Hadley, New York
Phone: (518) 696-5710
Email: info@4soc.com
Web: www.4soc.com
Zoar Outdoor – A Jackson Kayak Preferred Dealer

Massachusetts
7 Main St
Charlemont, Massachusetts
Phone: (800) 532-7483
Phone: (413) 339-8596
Email: info@zoaroutdoor.com
Web: www.zoaroutdoor.com